Across the Director’s Desk

Since the late 1970s, children have lost 12 hours per week in free time, including a 25% drop in playing and a 50% drop in unstructured outdoor activities, according to a study by the University of Michigan's Survey Research Center. During the same period, children's time in structured sports has doubled, and their passive, spectator leisure has increased from 30 minutes per week to over three hours.

We can debate the pros and cons of these changes for families but that is not the point. The issues are that children are overscheduled, families spend less time together and family life today often centers around children's activities rather than on purposeful family time.

In his book, "Putting Family First," William Doherty uses eight statements to describe overscheduled families:

1. We struggle to find time for unhurried family meals.

2. We think we spend too much time getting to and from our children's activities.

3. Homework can be difficult to squeeze into children's schedules.

4. My children don't have enough time to hang out and entertain themselves.

5. We wish we spent more time home as a family.

6. It is hard to visit with relatives and family friends because we are so busy.

7. We don't go on family trips and outings as much as we would like.

8. Even on weekends it can be hard to get the whole family together because of everyone's schedules.

Do any of these statements describe your family? Each family will have a different viewpoint on how important each of these items is because they address core values about family life. However, if you can identify with three or more of the statements, you probably are an overscheduled family.

Why are these statements important? Research is showing that regular family dinners, family rituals (especially at bedtime), a rich family life and community involvement are linked to children doing well in almost all areas of life.

It's important that families spend time together and connect with one another. Here are five ways to get started.

Turn off the television one night a week and use the time for playing board games, card games, pencil-and-paper games, or engaging in physical activity.

Eat one meal a day together. Use this time for talking about what happened that day or what is coming up.

Set a time to do household chores and enjoy a treat together when they're completed.

Turn off the radios, DVDs, and phones, and use time traveling in the car for games and conversation.

Reclaim or start bedtime rituals. Connecting with family members at the end of a day is an important way to let them know they are important and loved.

Celebrate the importance of family by reclaiming time together on a regular basis.